tfln

[uncommonly_kind]

01. A feather boa and 6 inch heels

02. I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch, but all you said was that I "ruined your hope and dreams of becoming an astronaut".

03. He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.

04. I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?

05. [Text her.]